Sunday, March 6, 2016

LIVING TOGETHER: A LURE TOWARD DIVORCE

The fifth way to divorce proof your marriage before you are married is not to live together before hand.  Couples have been misled into thinking that they can "try out" marriage by acting as if they are married to see if they are compatible, but there is an essential difference between cohabitation with no commitment and a covenant where a man and a woman become one flesh and promise to love each other till death ends their relationship.  Statistics collected by US Attorney Legal Service show that a couple who does not live together before marriage has a 20 percent chance of being divorced within five years, whereas if they cohabited, their chance of divorce is 49 percent, more than double.
If the couple thinks they will sidestep the issue by living together instead of marrying, 49 percent of them are likely to break up within five years, and the percentage who break up within 10 years is 62 percent, again nearly double the 33 percent for a married couple.  Only half of cohabiting couples marry within five years. Living together can often be more stressful due to the instability caused by the lack of a permanent commitment.  While society often doesn't condemn the couple living together, couples who come from a religious background will frequently have the uneasy sense that they are "living in sin" even if they are not willing to admit it, unlike Julia in Brideshead Revisited who realized that she was 
“Living in sin, with sin, by sin, for sin, every hour, every day, year in, year out. Waking up with sin in the morning, seeing the curtains drawn on sin, bathing it, showing it round, giving it a good time, putting it to sleep at night...."
Waiting to live together until you are actually married will not only increase your chances of a long and happy marriage, but before you are married it will enable you to sleep better, without that constant companion of guilt. 

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